It's Hard to Say No

I never anticipated that turning down orders is this difficult. I feel like closing my doors for blessings that are supposedly coming in. But I just got to say NO with a heavy heart. I just have to keep in mind how my body screamed for rest during those days when I only get 4 hours of sleep every single night. This is the time to cover up from too much sleep debt.

To give importance to the most important persons and things in life, I have to make a decision. When I quit work, I just wanted to be a mother and wife. That was my lifelong dream that as soon as we could afford it, I grabbed the opportunity to fulfil that dream. But I somehow twisted my fate by getting myself into a hobby that turned into a growing business. This is not what I wanted. This is not what I expected to happen. Now I'm confused whether I'd want to give this more opportunity to grow or just leave it to die a natural death by not taking in more of it. Now, I feel guilty whenever I wanted to stop. Many people are looking for opportunity to earn more income but couldn't find one and here I am wanting to quit with already that opportunity in my hand enough to make me feel guilty.

I am soon hiring my aunt's former househelp and I am hoping that loads will lighten up a bit. Somebody can do the procurement, clean up, basic baking and perhaps delivery for me and I will be left with just cake decorating. I can't foresee yet how it will turn out. We'll see in the next two months. For now, I just got to rest.